About Philthy Philthosa

Philthy’s manifesto… (or something)

All it can really say about it’s general philthosophy is that art shouldn’t have to be good, nor artists talented.

Philthy tries to produce as much public shit art as possible, purely to inspire people… the effects should result in the general populace thinking something along the lines of: “Friggin hell! I can do better than that shit”

It also thinks that art exhibitions in melbum should be way more inclined to supplying free (or at least heavily subsidised) booze n snacks. This goes a long way towards encouraging audience attendees to think your art is good. xph

3 thoughts on “About Philthy Philthosa

  1. Raph Francis

    Dear Philthy,

    Your blog is a poorly-written piece of crap, d0n’t get me started with your abhorrent use of the English language and grammar.

    If you want to support the artistist community, do it by purchasing some works 0nce in a while, that’s how we pay for our 2-minute noodles that we eat every day.

    If you want some free wine and cheese, pop 0n a power-suit and go to a banking or finance event and menti0n that you’re a friend of ‘Steve’. D0n’t suck the blood out of a community that struggles to survive even without people like you.

    I accept that you’re an alcoholic freeloader, but maybe you could just beg for change 0n the street instead of pretending that you give a crap about art.

    Yours truly,


    (Please excuse my spelling as your blog doesn’t allow the word 0n)

  2. Philthy Philthosa

    awesome. Such vehemence! U must b a ‘seriarse arsetits’. I like your notion that $$$ & ‘buying work’ is the only real support i (or anyone?) could offer the artistic community. There I was thinking arty farty people like you & I hate the systemic influence of capitalism on the art world, but i guess we’re all learning.
    Disseminating this information for friends, fiends & strangers takes a long time. Longer if one uses the kind of ‘la-di-dah proper words’ you’re demanding, I list & publish this content coz I’m forgetful & want to make an informed decision about what to attend. I share it coz (some) ppl say it’s useful & I support copyfree/creative commons principles. Oh yeah, and free speech.

    It’s only s’posed to be a calendar of art openings. It lists basic info on art openings & events in a chronological manner. ‘2nyt’ means ‘tonight’, blah blah. Do I really have to translate? I deliberately avoid including opinion based comments or descriptors/reviews of shows because in general I find personal opinions kinda useless as a source of information. Even *gasp* yours. If anyone’s interested in any of these events then they can follow the link, or spend 10 minutes per event looking it up for themselves. I don’t get how you can take so much offense to such a dumb webpage, but now I know you do, so good on you for speaking up!

    As for the ‘About’ page you’re so offended by, do you really not get the ‘tongue in cheekiness’? I’ll definitely add more sarcastic emoticons in to help the difficult journey through non-standard language you seem to be enduring (I won’t, but just in case you don’t get it *<_ insert sarcasm here*). I use licence with language & grammar coz I feel like it. We’re not at school anymore, mum. (or are you? at ‘Art school’? I’m trying not to stereotype, but that may explain a lot. I find your traditional idea(s) stagnant (was there more than 1 idea – & I use the term loosely – included here?), your lack of humour disturbing, your deathly seriousness boringly yawnsworthy (despite it’s HAIRYARSE…i mean HILARIARSENESS) & inability to translate confusing, especially when you’ve obviously spent a bit of time mentally undressing my super-sexy blog. I am a very very serious artiste & you should be able to tell that from my amazing MS paint image in the site banner. Sometimes my talent astounds even me so I’m sorry (but not surprised) to hear how jealous you are. *sigh*
    How can I help you understand…? You know how not all artists use authentic paint? Some use shit & blood. Please consider my alternative language the shit & blood equivalent of ‘English (UK/Aus spelling version)’. Let’s call it shorthand to lend it some legitimacy

    It IS a bit lame that you can’t argue a point without resorting to personal insults – especially insults based on incorrect arse-U-mptions (I put the “U” in especially for you). And I think it’s unfair that you’ve sullied the good name of homeless people & street beggars (or are they all smackies to you?) by lumping them with me… And I doubt ‘they’ have easy access to the internet to respond to such an offensive remark. Your implicit lack of sensitivity & compassion for people with addictions & substance use issues is a bit depressing, but ah well. Your views are well supported by a large proportion of society, so maybe take solace in that? Surely the fact I disagree with your …err…comment (?) makes you super happy & supports whatever your issue is?! If you’d have done some research first you’d have found plenty of ammunition for accurate, targeted & much more effective insults. I can hook you up with some other haters, if you want? There’s a few of you around, but unfortunately most aren’t so brave as to self-identify & allow 2-way communication on a forum like you – so PROPS to you!

    My question to you is – If you don’t like it (read: really, really, really hate it), why not move along to something you do like? Constructive criticism is always welcomed by philthosophy, Your comment is obviously more cuntstrucktive than constructive, but I like it muuuuuch better coz I got you all passionate & stuff. Often art is polarising, yes? So I’ll take that to mean my blog in itself is a piece of art. And a priceless piece of art at that – mainly coz it ain’t got no pricetag…

    Unfortunately a community is made up of diverse people & viewpoints (good ones are, anyway) and I’m a part of it. Bah ha haha! Even super fancy gallery owners have said they appreciate philthosophy & seem to get the irreverant attitude as a j0ke. There are jerks everywhere… You think I’m 1, I think you’re 1. Not everyone agrees with each other. It’s preferable they don’t.

    Yes my blog has intermittent mentions of the importance of cheese/snacks/drinks/wotever. So…? I go to exhibitions that AREN’T openings, I actually buy drinks, I go to openings without any cheese or booze, blah blah, You obviously noticed my ‘art dero’ side, but why would I spend so much time & effort on compiling accessible information without charge if I only cared about the booze? It’s quicker & easier to get a cask of goon & hang out in the gutter at home – & I usually take the lazy option if there’s 1 available. Der!
    I do, however, use cheese, entry fee, drink prices, art, travel logistics & my expectations of the people/scene attending to determine which openings I go to. I don’t think compulsory donations should be called ‘donations’. I’ve bought art, I’ve had art bought for me. I don’t sell art & hope never to do so, as I prefer the idea of giving it away. You seem so offended at my being swayed by boozeahol that you totally ignored the fact that cheese is my priority (gosh I am so tragically misunderstood – which makes me even more of a ‘proper’ artist),

    Aside from all this, haven’t you noticed at student galleries/whatever, the crowd is usually PACKED when there are free or cheap drinks &/or snacks , and as soon as stocks run out the majority of attendees leave? Do you find that offensive & call them all alchofreeloaders? Or do you delude yourself that it’s just coz they’ve already seen everything or that it’s close to closing time? The statement you’ve taken such offense to (which was intended as half-joking/half-insight) was a result of hundreds of hours of observation & behavioural evidence-gathering. My personal opinion, based on attending an average of 20-30 exhibitions a week since 2005 ) is that greater audience attendance occurs when there’s drinks n shit. Don’t blame me, I just commented on it & think I understand the reason behind this crowd compulsion.
    Didn’t my inclusion of a ‘How do you judge an exhib’ poll with options of booze, cheese or the ‘art’ (note inverted comments) give you a hint that I’m not being super serious? People always seem to think the worst when judging people, & attribute nasty intentions or stupidity when there is none (or much, at least). Of course you have to protect your own world view, but you don’t have to do it by assuming you know the values & intentions of others…. & yup, you’ve done exactly that.

    Why not flip your assumptions & test both sides of your hypothesis that “Philth don’t care shit about Art & is singlehandedly destroying the art scene because it grabs a couple of the free drinks that are already on offer”?
    Oh, also – lots of galleries have standing sponsorship deals with booze providers in melbum, so it’s not necessarily depriving the poor artistic community of anything they didn’t get for free, & in fact many galleries wouldn’t get free sponsorship without large crowds made up of people like U & I. It’s elementary marketing. Some galleries charge more for drinks than the local bottle & some attendees pay that extra to support art. Some people don’t drink & go to look at the art. I get more pleasure out of looking, smelling, touching the art on display than ‘investing in’ or ‘owning’ it. I consider art an experience, not a product to purchase. So we obviously differ in that element too.

    Practically every artist I know would love free publicity, a large opening night crowd, semi-intelligent *(or at least engaging) conversations on the art, etc. Some people I know find alcohol socially lubricating & actually go & chat to the artist, or *gasp* say what they actually think about the work (instead of “wow, it’s nice, I like it”). And if yr really concerned about the effects of alcoholism on the art scene in Melbourne, why not donate some of your very important money to rehabilitation programs for addicts? Even better save yr very valuable moneys & invest in information! You could do a pHD with Turning Point or St Vincents hospital on the negative effects of providing beer

    Your apology for using a zero isn’t accepted coz it’s not necessary. It’s pretty obvious I love abbreviated txt/net-based shorthand. I, similarly, apologise for such a lengthy discussion of your initial comment, but i have taken childish pleasure in the idea that if you DID read it, it would be very annoying 4u. I doubt we’ll ever ‘get’ each other & am certain we’ll both feel extremely comforted by that fact. I’m not trying to discount the intensity & strength of your opinion..i just think homeless people, alcoholics, cheese-lovers & shit artists are people too & have no doubt I’d prefer their company to yours.
    Maybe next time u can go make nasty bully comments someone who gives a shit that their opinion differs to yours, If you’re really mean, they’re more likely to get upset & might even commit suicide, thus making your world more that little bit more uniform & easier for you to cope with?

    FYI -If you ever have an exhibition & want shit publicity just lemme know & I’d happily add any details. I even promise not to call you a douche, or draw cocks all over your promotional image as you don’t seem like the type who’d like it. And who am I to comment on your douchiness – or lack thereof (although it does take 1 to know 1)?
    Just for you I will carry a packet of meegoreng on me to every opening I attend in future. If you come up & say ‘hi’, it’ll be all yours. Just coz I feel sorry for you & the fact you seem a victim of a poorly thought out career choice. Everyone knows artists suffer starvation – but that’s only coz they don’t take advantage of the free fucking cheese readily available & spoon-fed to you by philthosophy.
    Dr Phil(th)
    Doctorate of Philthosophy

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>