• Stutter xmas party w.Stutter bigband / Sweatlung / Sabbatical / Cyclic Defrost 8:30pm at horse bazaar 397  lil lonsdale st

• Art book opener/launch at 200 gertrude st, fitzry 6-7:30pm

• Tango8:Love and Food Launch frm 7-11pm  at Mr Wilkinson(bar) 295 Lygon St, brnswk

• Guildford lane gallery-LAST Wednesday Project 6:30 drinks n food sponsors, Café 343 and Melaleuca with Muzak 7pm incl: Rod Cooper, Vessel Project 20-24 guildford lane - off queen b/w latrobe & lil lonsdale (beware the horror stinge bar chick)

• Siemens/RMIT Fine Art Awards 15:00-19:00 (Opening Night) RMIT Gallery,344 Swanston Street,

• Diploma of Arts(Graphic Art) Inside Out, 16:30 – 18.30 (Industry review)18.30 – 20.30 (Opening) The Atrium, Brunswick Town Hall, 233 Sydney Road, Brunswick

• Platform opening, degraves st subway 6-8pm

• henna opener @ 322 brnswk st 6-8pm

• Bus gallery performances & soundstallations at 117 littlelonsdale  $5/10 donation 8pm – chris nylstoch, jezzat

• Optical eyes at rear view gallery8pm 244rear smith st (from stanley st take 2nd alley on left)   

• Utopian Slumps ‘grow wild curated by Sleep Club’ opener 6-9pm 5/25 Easey St, Collingwood (via alley)

- Guildford lane opener, Grad exhib 1-5pm sunday sponsor = mountain goat beer. . 20-24 guildford lane gallery, off queen b/w Latrobe & lil Lonsdale

- 12-4:30pm Dodds st. Southbank Bicycle Film Festival Street Party Gleefully featuring one of Australia’s original cyber artists, Troy Innocent.Apply liberal coats of bike lube and get down to the first Art orgy of the season.All that is needed is yourself – no bike no cash no worries.

RMIT end o year art (design/architecture/advertising/etc plus real work, like drawing) graduate exhibitions – friggin heaps of openings, from 19 oct -16 dec.

Go to – http://www.rmit.edu.au/browse;ID=ezkzyc2eanrs1 for a full list. i canna be fuckd.

PS – the wankier the school, the better ‘quality’ (& methinks quantity) the booze n snacks – much like in real life 

high vibes high st northcote. 11am – 11pm.

8 eastment st whorehouse ruccus 2-4pm

horsebazaar SxSxSx + HOLY BONER + COLLAPSED TOILET VIETNAM 5pm

- studio opener Anytime Place – Opening Shindig Thing 9pm-3am 20 Ovens Street, Brunswick Much stuff n tar& feathers art muzak drinkly snacks… etc $5

- 1st annual pan-brnswk car wash interpretive dance championship 8pm->morn at carwash next door to 1 Stewart St, Brunswick 1. The Main Event: find devastating costumes, chose your worst goodbad song and enter a team. No entrant too pathetic, no act too random. Crump it up, break it down; you and your crew have three and a half minutes to impress our overly-opinionated and extra-inebriated judges, selected randomly on the night. 2. Slow-mo Crumping Battle: go one on one, southern-style in our chopped-n-screwed slow-mo crump-off. 3. The Kate Bush Knockout Derby Endurance Challenge: one Kate Bush song. Looped. Forever. If you slack off, lose interest, trip, stumble or repeat a dance move, you’re out. Only the strong will survive. Last wo/man standing takes all. 4. The 2009 Interpretive Dance centrefold calendar photo shoot: strike a pose against our backdrop of shame with your dance team before you hit the stage. The twelve worst photos will make it into the 2009 Interpretive Dance calendar, to be distributed to every trendy café in the greater Brunswick Region. Enduring ironic hipster cred guaranteed

- sutton gallery art opener 4-6pm 254 brnswk st

- guildford lane art opener 4-6pm 20-24 guildford lane Join the artists for discussion and drinks as their residency nears its completion Elin Eriksen and Miles Brown are in the midst of creating a rich, experiential and immersive installation.

- art opener & muzak at glitch bar 318 st georges rd. 6pm-12am Oscar Vincente Slorach-Thorn, Inquiet, Witness girl, Wonderful Fellowship, Mot. $5 entry. Exhiibition of Dyana Gray’s and Ben Montero’s work from 6pm

- dont ban the can 12pm sat-12am sun @ clifton park victoria st brnswk. Bands syde Projects w/ Mr Moonshine(Live), Horse Competition(live), Simon Wright and the Eclective(live) Mc’s Broken Tooth Entertainment (live), Dizzy Dee(Live), Phenomena (Live), Prospa (Live), Fluent Form (Live), Illuminate (Live), Mantra (Live), Litigate (Live) DJ’s Mu-Gen, Flip, Lewis Cancut, Dj Fa, Dj Rintrah, Benny B, Dstract + more Break-dancers Fresh Sox crew & Wicked Force crew Live Painting; “AEROSKILLS” Graff Jam, “CRUNCH” throwie comp, “Over Kill” Hand stlyes comp, “We Make Stuff Good” Sketch comp Visuals; Eness, Blu Blu, TEAM ATTACK!! www.DontBanTheCan.com

within earshot opener @ first site, RMIT, 344 swanston. 5:30- 7:30pm… “experience psycho-seductive sound scapes, Lo-Fi sound emitting clay pots, and pregnant mannequin sound sculptures, before a final night ‘plug-in and play’ style free improvisation, featuring all members of the Within Earshot collective in what will be an interactive, vibrant and chaotic array of Multi-Channel sound”

possible openers 6pm-ish at 45 downstairs, flinders lane & ARC one ground flaw of 45 flinders lane.

Also foodNotBombs 7:30pm at corner of brnswk & gertrude streets, fitzroy

Garage of Stale @forepaw, 275 high st northcote throughout 11am-7pm sat-sun 23-24 aug … Oh man, we got so much shit to get rid of. Books, zines, magazines, piles of cassettes, musical instruments, electronic devices, toys, art supplies, clothing, shoes. Knick-knacks, gee-gaws and lots of flim-flam. A ridiculous, enormous Hum-Vee-like video projector supposedly “sourced” from Crown Casino. A four-draw filing cabinet. A couple of bookshelves. A cute little desk. A television with faux wood panelling. We are very keen to get this fucking garbage out of our lives so just about any offer will be accepted as long as can take the stuff away. For smaller items, we’ll be running a “Fill A Bag for 5 Bucks or so” deal, so you can gorge yourself on our unwanted stuff.

1. SWAP DAY FUNDRAISER Sunday 17 August, 12.00pm – 3.00pm $10 entry at Fitzroy Learning Network 198 Napier Street, Fitzroy. Food available for a small donation. It’s going to be fun! All you need to do is bring 10 items: books or clothing. We’ll give you some tokens at the door and you can get swapping. Can’t make it? You can still help us by donating quality books, clothing and accessories. Just call us to organise a drop-off time on 94217 2897 or email admin@fitzroylearningnetwork.org.au All funds raised go to the Refugee Support Program at the Fitzroy Learning Network.  To register your interest in the event or to arrange an early drop off time, please call or email the network. 2. Sketch City @ Laundry Bar. Sunday August 17th… Burners, Beats and Battles! This Sunday join Sketch City for our Scribble Jam afternoon at Laundry! From 4PM, see live drawing by your fave street artists, Live graff battles and giveaways AND live jam from Pataphysics and High Society with open mic. Heaps of surfaces will be available to draw on, plus drink specials until 7PM and live Dub, Reggae and Dubstep from 9PM! @ Laundry – 50 Johnston St Fitzroy.